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Why, why, why?

My girlfriend is constantly getting mad at me for things that say trigger her and reminds her of past abusers. Im a real patient guy, we have a beautiful family and I know she loves me and Viseversa.

I love her with all my heart. I just dont know what to do anymore.?Now shes playing mind games by having an excellent day, then turning around locking me out of our bedroom for no reason and she wont give a reason.

I might of done wrong at the start of the relationship, but its been years since iv done her wrong and I feel like the insults and mind games should stop! Please give me advise.

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35 Responses

  1. Use your words. Let her know how you feel.

  2. Ah it’s Sudbury. Just leave her be and fix yourself. Worry about yourself and if you have kids them too. She may come around or may not. Don’t waste time on waiting. Let her chase you instead. If she don’t than obviously it wasn’t worth staying

  3. Brenda Lynn Brenda Lynn says:

    Communication and willingness to communicate. If you burned her she may forgive but not forget. But she must leave the past in the past. She’s obviously living her present back there. Maybe counselling.
    If a couple wants it to work…it will.

  4. Throw it back at her, who is she to treat you like that. Past abuser bs that’s no reason for her to abuse you. Lay down the law and tell her that behavior will not be tolerated

  5. Matt Taylor Matt Taylor says:

    Leave, the mind games dont stop until you find out youre getting cheated on. Abused or not if theyre playing mind games they arent ready to have a mature relationship.

  6. Its not easy forgetting about any type of abuse and moving on. You can walk away from it but it scars you forever. It requires intense therapy and learning to love yourself again. She obviously needs some counseling. Breaking up the family isnt the answer. If he loves her and she loves him, then maybe this is something that would help them both learn to deal with her triggers.

  7. Get rid of her
    .while she is locked in her room she is snap chatting some other guy garenteed!don’t trust Sudbury chicks. ..they have a defect in the gene pool there and they all lie and cheat! true story bud just run !!

  8. I’m going on five years since my last true relationship.
    I’m not ready.
    Some times people jump into things to fast when they’re really not ready for it.
    If you’d live together go spend some time at a friends or your parents.
    She most likely does love you, but didn’t have her time to heal from her last relationship.

    It’s not your fault by any means.
    I know for me a look can trigger me the way a person breaths.
    It’s only because that’s what stuck in her head.

  9. From what you wrote it sounds like a form of control, in a blink of an eye your walking on eggshells ,do you wanna live like that?

  10. Matty Morris Matty Morris says:

    Time to bounce, women just get crazier. Run bro run!!!

  11. Andie Cerson Andie Cerson says:

    Is she locking herself in a room with her phone? Is she the one saying shes being triggered, or are you excusing it for her?
    Either way …. sounds like if it’s legit triggered, she could use some counselling. Being aware of the issue is only part of the solution. Learning to handle and let go of it is the rest.
    But if you’re just excusing her, you seem to lack self respect and dont deserve that.

  12. Well it’s like this, she hates you because your a fucken asshole, airing you personal life on FB. Do you think all the strangers realy give a fuck or are willing to help. You shoud be dumped at the curb side. Grow a pair an handle it yourself. Keep your dirty laundry off my line I don’t give a fuck !!

  13. U sound amazing she sounds like a b

  14. Maybe she’s looking for a way out & she wants u to be the one to leave .so she doesn’t have to .IDK ..

  15. Yeah people do need time, but that can start any day. If she isn’t doing anything to help herself, then don’t bring down your mental health by trying to get her to help herself. You have to make choices.

    You can bring a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.

  16. Love how people would be screaming to run or leave an calling them an abusive piece of shit if it were a dude. Crazy abusive woman?” Ehh leave her alone. She needs help. Pick your battles. ” Pathetic.

  17. Let her heal!!! Don’t pressure her. Give her her time!!!!

  18. Mandy Evans Mandy Evans says:

    Abuse comes in many forms and doesnt choose which sex it happens to before u get triggered n do something stupid walk awat

  19. Run dude, even if you pull a muscle trying to escape,, just do so for your sake brother

  20. I would ask her to go to therapy. By herself first and after that, when she is better in her mind then go to couples therapy.

  21. If it’s from historical sexual abuse please tell her to reach out to Lisa at Voices for Women

  22. If someone’s not ready to be in a relationship cause they haven’t healed, they need to spend that time alone finding themselves again and heal 100%.

  23. Welcome to dealing with someone with an abusive past. It takes ALOT of patience.

  24. Get her the professional help she truly needs. She needs to deal with her own demons before you guys will be happy.

  25. Debrah Blair Debrah Blair says:

    Respect her wishes and leave her alone,also respect yourself enough to know you deserve better.

  26. Lynn Kohls Lynn Kohls says:

    She probably needs some professional help. Because of the past abusers she might be pushing you away without even realizing it out of fear.

  27. Delmo Gotti Delmo Gotti says:

    Good luck Buddy maybe she is looking to get out and wants to pick a fight to get to a point where it gets nasty and the relationship de solves

  28. Love her enough to leave her. Don’t stay, you’ll only be miserable. We teach people how to treat us.

  29. Linda says:

    She needs counseling to straighten things out for herself and better understand why she does the things she does and maybe just a sounding board to talk about stuff that`s happened. These things don`t just go away on their own. They`re always there and come out in different ways. And then once she`s had that, counseling for two might be a good way to be able to voice stuff, to see the other`s perspective in a non threatening/defensive way, how it affects the other and how to be supportive. Because that`s what two people that love each other do: support one another. Hear one another out. Have needs met.

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