Relationship Problem

So here’s the deal. My husbans knew I was in school for law. I met him 5 years ago and we’ve been married for 2. I’m nearing the end of my education.

Recently he told me that if I became a lawyer he was going to leave me because he doesn’t care to be with someone who’s in the law field… 😂😂😂

I know, I know it’s hilarious. I tried to make him see how stupid he sounds. Here’s the scenario:

Person: “so, why did you leave your wife?”
Him: “oh because she became a lawyer.”
Person: “you left her for getting a really good career?”
Him: “yeah, because I don’t really care about the law.”

Now, I never talk about school or the law with him unless he asks me something pertaining to the law.

Just wondering if everyone else thinks it’s as stupid as I do.

I mean, if he wants to divorce me over my law career, all power to him. He clearly never supported me or loved me anyways. No sweat off my back. I do love him, and it will hurt if he does choose to leave me over that reason. But honestly, he knew what I was doing with my life when we first got together. I was in my 1st year of law.

I’d talk to my friends and family, but I already know they would think it’s the dumbest thing they ever heard. Just trying to get the perspectives of others who don’t know us


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160 Responses

  1. Gail Decaire Gail Decaire says:

    Can’t help but think how flaky this post is! You really need facebook’S advice here?? No you don’t, talk about trolling..

    Who says that “ I’ll leave you if you become a lawyer”
    ? Nobody! Either you’re lying and looking for social media attention or he really is coward and is looking for an easy way out. Either way this social attention is weird. Friends can help you, you are going for bias opinions?? Lolol

  2. Linda says:

    Listen to this take: He didn`t think, you gonna make it. That`s why you`re surprised now. Because you are getting closer to the goal you had set, back then. Better to see true colors now, then even 5 more years down the road. Move on, shine on. Bigger and better things. Truer things. Of course this (your circumstance) makes no sense. How could it. No need to try to comprehend it. He has spoken. Don`t think it has anything to do with other reasons. Maybe control. Control your dreams, your happiness, your potential. No way. Deal breaker right there, in big, cheap, flashing neon lights. Otherwise? Recipe for unhappiness and bitterness. No one has the right to put a cap on someone`s potential. It happens often in abusive people. And if a woman were to put a stop to her dreams, guess what? Then it`s something else afterward guaranteed. Won`t like your too pretty hair. Won`t like your sense of style. Won`t like your friends. Won`t like that you see your family. Maybe just another “prove your love” tactic. Which is also abusive in itself. And love doesn`t do that. In the end…(for him) it`s all about him. That`s the reason behind the why. And that`s why it makes no sense, because healthy relationships don`t work that way. Maybe do it quick? Be less painful down the road. File the papers, get it over with, turn the page. He stated what he wants. That`s on him. And that`s the price he has set for you. No need to accept. This is 2019. Your decision! For all you know, he could drop the ultimatum and down the road it`ll be some other nonsense demand. Not your fault. To cap someone`s dreams… To force someone`s hand to get them to prove their love? Not healthy. Oh, and by the way? Keep up the good work. I can`t imagine how hard your studies must be!

  3. Mike Ockerts Mike Ockerts says:

    Put on a 9 inch strap on and fuck the stupid out of him.

  4. To the curb Mofo!! Do not pass go..Do not collect allimony..Just worthy…hang in there girl…

  5. Izzy Silver Izzy Silver says:

    Clearly it’s an easy excuse to leave he just doesn’t want the relationship anymore

  6. Obviously he didn’t think you would make it all the way through your schooling, Good for you, that is something to be extremely proud of!! I would definitely tell him that he didn’t need to you leave you, because you are leaving him. Some men can’t stand it when a woman is strong and independent. You should walk away, chin up, and let him see what he is going to be missing. Btw, just curious, what field of law?

  7. Lee Tessier Lee Tessier says:

    I hope you picked family law so that if/when he leaves you it will be more benefit to you! Lmao

  8. Divorce him and marry a lawyer

  9. That’s sooo stupid .. lmao screw him then

  10. Mark Debelak Mark Debelak says:

    It is hes being stupid if he truly cares about u he would support any career u choose besides a lawyer is a very well paid job

  11. That is the dumbest thing ever!! Leave his ass

  12. Delmo Gotti Delmo Gotti says:

    He better get his myself a good lawyer

  13. Ummm if he does support you ,kick him to their curb, u might find a better man

  14. Live life don’t waste it with someone who doesn’t support what you have achieved so far in took law so this means you are smart, get out of this negative situation! Enjoy your career while you’re young!

  15. And you’re going to be a lawyer?

  16. He’s not telling you the real reason obviously

  17. Dumb reason. Ask him the real reasons!

  18. Taking a paralegal course at Canadian Career College is NOT going lead to you being a lawyer.

  19. Specialize in divorce lol that will show him

  20. Does he have a criminal record you don’t know about? Lol

  21. Nicole LeBel Nicole LeBel says:

    Divorce him now before the money comes in and you loose it all

  22. Throw the whole husband away.

  23. This works out for you in the end…you can hire yourself to take him for every thing he’s got lol jk

  24. Lees LM Lees LM says:

    Don’t let him let you miss out on your dream, he has a problem with it not you. Keep going and let him decide on his own what he wants to do.

  25. I fought the law and the law won

  26. LOL he doesn’t deserve you then, I’d say it’s time you dump him

  27. Divorce him . Find someone who respects your choice of career,and the years of hard work you have put into it.

  28. I’m sorry but is he a moron he knew you were in school for law
    Did he think that when you graduated you were going to get a job in a different field

    He leave you for that reason it’s his loss screw him

  29. Kori Marie Kori Marie says:

    Sounds like he could be jealous. A lot of men like to be the bread winners in the relationship and maybe it bothers him that you might make more than him..? Not an excuse to threaten divorce but have you discussed this possibility?

  30. Maks Bee Maks Bee says:

    Girrrrl, that’s ridiculous.
    Finishing school and getting a career in your field these days is fucking difficult and you should be SO proud of being able to accomplish something like Law School, he could be SO proud of you instead of trying to tear you down. If you’re proud of yourself, if you want to pursue what you want to pursue just call his fucking bluff and see what happens.
    If he truly loved you and cared about your relationship (weather you have kids or planning to) and realized that if this is something you feel compelled to pursue, unless it’s hurting you emotionally/physically, he’d support that.

  31. It’s only excuse, something else is going on.

  32. Let him leave if that’s what he chooses especially if he already knew then he is just being petty ffs lol he sounds like you will be better off if he decides to do that, I have went to school twice and if I go back to school all my husband has asked is that i make sure it is really what i want because school is expensive

  33. Is he jealous? Sounds like an insecure man. His problem not yours. If you don’t have children with this man not worth the effort to stay. Will always try to control you

  34. CJ Borne CJ Borne says:

    One of the dumbest things I have ever heard.

  35. Angie Jones Angie Jones says:

    Absolutely ridiculous! Maybe he’s just intimidated.In a relationship, you are supposed to support your parters dreams,and goals. Good for you for achieving your goal, and if he can’t be proud and supportive, show him the door!

  36. Your a lawyer and air your personal problems on the internet ??? Can’t wait to read all about your on going cases here !! It’s simple really you have studied an trained for years now on how to lie an manipulate the truth to meet your client an your benefits . Sounds great my wife is a lawyer , but being trained to have things go your way an the tactics you are trained to use to get end results are not that useful in a relationship an no doubt you used them on your other half with out knowing it an the better you got the more often you used it until the final results , you turned him away . Should have been a doctor .

  37. Think if you are going to be a good lawyer, you can figure this one out yourself…..

  38. He doesn’t love you. Boom.
    Now leave.

  39. Sounds like he may be envious of you and your success. Also, he is so insecure that he could feel “I’ll dump her before she gets successful and realizes what a loser I am, and dumps me. Either or fits the scenario you later out. Good luck and continue to realize your dreams.

  40. Yeaaa. He almost sounds threatened

  41. Dale Speirs Dale Speirs says:

    Maybe he has the same beliefs as most ppl do, 90% of lawyers are untustworthy and crooked lol

  42. I say go for your career. He knew what you wanted to do with your life the moment he proposed.
    Honestly, it sounds very fishy… You deserve happiness and I think you’d resent him if you needed to change your happiness for his, especially something this dramatic.

  43. Maybe he is feeling threatened, because you are about to have a Great career, maybe better than his? He could be feeling left out, or inadequate.

  44. Don’t let this distract you from the fact that in 1966, Al Bundy scored four touchdowns in a single game while playing for the Polk High School Panthers in the 1966 city championship game versus Andrew Johnson High School, including the game-winning touchdown in the final seconds against his old nemesis, “Spare Tire” Dixon.

  45. I call bull cause, you can make this shyt up!

  46. The trash is taking itself out, let him go!

  47. That sucks, have you considered family law?

  48. Ben Rinaldo Ben Rinaldo says:

    IF WHAT YOU SAY IS TRUE, I think that you already have your answer. Musicians get this all the time. “Your gone every weekend. It’s either your guitar or me”. Being a musician, your genitals take over. 2 years later, you’re not together. From then on you adopt the statement “don’t give me a choice and YOU won’t lose”. You’re the entire package INCLUDING your career.

  49. Oh sweetie lol what a weiner, im wondering if he ever actualy asked himself where your education would lead you. Sounds like a gem, lol no sweat off your back forsure. Best of luck, move on you’ve got every thing going for you!

  50. Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

    The man is an idiot for sticking it out as long as he did, if she was upfront about her intentions.

    On the other hand good for him for leaving, he knows she won’t have time for a family.

    When she hits the wall and wants a family but can’t, she can’t blame anyone but herself

  51. Renee Leduc Renee Leduc says:

    Tell him you want to be a stay at home wife. That you require a pedicure and manicure and allowance every week of at least $500.00.

  52. Joel Whipple Joel Whipple says:

    Crap, I think I could find you a hundred guys lined up to take you. Lol

  53. There is obviously some feelings and insecurities that need to be sorted out. I would look into this further and see if you guys could come to a mutual understanding. It would suck to throw a marriage away for something petty and silly.

  54. Sue Gohr Sue Gohr says:

    Leave the fucker, your worth so much more.

  55. The error is yours for keeping him so long… I’d say: “bye bye la”…

    Don’t let anyone hold you back… you only walk through this world once, this isn’t a practice

  56. Do you carve out enough time for each other? There’s gotta be something else bugging him lol I’d try to find the root, marriage is worth fighting for if you two love each other.

  57. JoAnn Scott JoAnn Scott says:

    Chantal Beaulieu my thought was quit school now because as a lawyer you should be able to make him believe whatever you want?!? Like she sucks if the husband wins an argument

  58. You should not need anyone’s perception on this, you know the answer……

  59. I think he didn’t really understand the time and long hours of becoming a lawyer, doctor and such. He thought you could still be a wife and mother also. He feels lonely. Women can’t have both a family and a career. I have a question for you. Want do you want more, a successful career or a successful family. There’s nothing wrong with being a wife and mother and such. I’m a stay at home housewife and I’m very happy.

    • Women for the last 30 to 40 years have been working full time along side with men raising their families…. might wanna travel back to 1910

    • Women for the last 30 to 40 years have been working full time along side with men raising their families…. might wanna travel back to 1910

    • That’s ridiculous. If a woman wants to go to school to pursue a career that would only benefit her family financially, she should do it. It’s not easy do be a stay at home mother; this person never mentioned kids FYI. But you can have a great family and a great job. You just need to learn what to sacrifice and when. You can’t ignore your family 98% of the time for school and work and not know why your alone afterwards.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Stephanie C. Byers it might not be for every woman…but women can have both if they want it and make it work…

    • Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

      Mercedes Ivy Lynne Miller ” If a woman wants to go to school to pursue a career that would only benefit her family financially, ”

      And be a detriment in every other facet of family life.

      You can not have a full time job and be a full time mother.
      At least be honest with your husband and be honest with yourself

    • Daniel Enous why is hubby not being full time? Equality Right? My mom provided more for me working and going to school showing me I could do both I had the strength and determination to be great as both a mother and a woman who works and supports her own. Why do we need to cater to the men when they have feet hands legs and a functioning heart beat to get blood flowing to their extremities that make it so they can clean cook and care for themselves and children. We are not slaves to you we are individuals.

    • Daniel Enous what is it with people.

      So what you’re saying is you can’t have a career and a home life? it’s either one or the other?

      What about all those families who have a home, with working parents, and loving children? it’s called balance. People need to learn how to balance their home life and work life.

    • Stephanie C. Byers I know plenty of people with successful families and careers. I also know some career housewives who’s marriages ended 10 years down the road and the woman found herself with no career, no income from hubby and no skills or resume in order to find good employment to support herself. Or they stay in a loveless marriage because they’re trapped…. Different things work for different people. Just because you chose to be a stay at home mom/wife doesn’t mean the other option is wrong or impossible.

    • Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

      Stephanie Lamarche You don’t need to cater to men, simply don’t get involved in a relationship with men.

      But understand their are far more females than males in Canada

    • Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

      Mercedes Ivy Lynne Miller You can have both but more often than not, males don’t like the idea of a babysitter or daycare raising their children. I know this is a foreign concept for women, but if you want someone else to raise your children, why have them to beign with?

    • Real men want an equal partner not a subservient child who can’t support herself never learnt how and will not be able to help you when you need it.
      We don’t need to change for a man and make ourselves less to ourselves so the man feels better about himself. If that’s the case and he needs to be above her he’s not a man he’s a pathetic abusive child.

    • Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

      Stephanie Lamarche Nope, real men want an equal partner, as in equal but different.

      Men don’t want a stranger, babsitter or daycare, to take care of their children. Because they know that a stranger will never love and nurture and take care of their children the same as the children’s mother.

      This was all common knowledge to females of course, until feminism infected them.

      But like i said, go ahead and use a turkey baster and a sperm bank, because fortunately their are still women out their with there head on straight.

    • Daniel Enous…one or the other has to leave their job to care for the child. If the wife has a great career then why can’t the man stay home to take care of child if he doesn’t want the child with a babysitter or in daycare??? They both agree to have children …why should the wife be expected to give up her career instead of the man.

    • Daniel Enous that’s really sad that you think like that. Some men yes, think themselves as babysitters. I got lucky with a man who is more than happy to support me and stay home. Also, both my kids are school age as of next September so if I choose to go to school and get a career, I’m supported to do so. We’re a team. I’m not a slave to my family where they’ll fall apart with me gone a few hours a day.

      Takes two to tango. If the man actually thinks it’s the woman’s job to just stay home and raise the kids; he should have voiced that before procreating.

    • Mercedes Ivy Lynne Miller It’s not only men, there’s also some women who believe women can be if they choose to stay home take care of her family and keep the house while the husband goes out and work.

    • I’m one of those women.

    • Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

      Erica Villneff Oh i understand, so i called him a moron, as long as she was open and honest about her intentions from the get go

      But he also has a right to leave the relationship.

    • Daniel Enous Daniel Enous says:

      Mercedes Ivy Lynne Miller “Takes two to tango. If the man actually thinks it’s the woman’s job to just stay home and raise the kids; he should have voiced that before procreating.”

      Agreed, and if the women believed that it was against her feminist sensibilities to be a stay-at-home wife/mother, she should say that from the get go.

      Standard operating procedure is the man makes the money which the woman spends on the family.

    • Daniel Enous it doesn’t make me a feminist to be able of reversing the roles so I can have a career.

      I’m a stay at home mom, I know what it’s like. But I also know that if I want to pursue a career, I have the support I need.

      Support is needed in relationships to survive.

    • Daniel Enous it doesn’t make me a feminist to be able of reversing the roles so I can have a career.

      I’m a stay at home mom, I know what it’s like. But I also know that if I want to pursue a career, I have the support I need.

      Support is needed in relationships to survive.

    • Stephanie Lamarche it should never be it’s my money in a relationship, it should be called out money. Doesn’t matter if you both bring in the money of just one of you do, it’s still should be our money.

    • Shawna Leah Shawna Leah says:

      Daniel Enous so if r a working man doing full time ….u also can’t be a full time dad either

    • Shawna Leah Shawna Leah says:

      Daniel Enous so if a man doesnt like the idea of daycare or sitters…..why does the woman only have to sacrifice her career? Maybe u should quit ur job and be a full time stay at home dad

    • Shawna Leah Shawna Leah says:

      Daniel Enous ya if we are before the 1950s sure. However even with a decent job….two incomes are sometimes needed regardless in these times.

  60. Well. The justice system is ass backwards. Thus making you an ass backwards woman . Women are already ass backwards. I couldn’t even imagine .

  61. go for your career, never mind him .you must be doing good if he,s insecure about the mentioned he doesn,t support, or love why hang on to some thing that isnt there.don,t you think you have enough on your plate with schooling.never mind what family and friends have to say if you already know their are big enough to post this situation on face book,then you should be big enough to make a decision on whats right for you.i beleive taking law is a stressful course,but do you need the extra aggravation of some one threatening divorce if you should be successful.his reasoning from i have read is childish,manipulation is more like him out on it.he wants a divorce, then let him have it.whats more important to you,a career in law that your working hard on ,or a relationship that isn,t,re a big girl,make whats right for also mentioned being hurt from this,guess what.every one hurts when a relationship comes to an end.just know it wasn,t you who wanted the big d. you will get over this hurtful time just like many others in your time. but in the long run,you will be the one go and get that career and dont let nothing stop you.

  62. I’m sorry, but for a man to leave you because of your education there’s a lot more going on than what he’s telling you. Sounds more like an excuse to be honest and I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if there was someone else in the picture.

  63. Leave him now, while still in debt of school. Because once you are making the big bucks, he won’t deserve a dime if that’s his attitude. Get out now, and ahead for yourself. Let him be the one regretting life later. The power is all yours. Take it.

  64. Wtf. Makes good money. Obviously smart…has drive and ambition …the fuxks buddy’s problem lol

  65. I agree with Maverine, I think he is insecure about the large differences there will be in yearly incomes. Honestly, kick him to the curb. He’s an idiot. My sister is in law school and I see how hard she works towards her goals every day, I couldn’t imagine how much harder that would be on her if she didn’t have a loving and supportive partner. Get rid of him before you end up having to pay him alimony for the rest of your life. Please please please kick him to the curb before he costs you more than your education did.

  66. Well he isn’t really giving you an option……as if your going to just stop….becoming a lawyer…… what he is really saying is I’m leaving you….but he wont man up and say it so instead he made it impossible for you to not be the catalyst for the break up…. in his pea brain

  67. About 6 months ago, I started dating a guy. He made good money but I made better money. When he found out, he got upset. When I asked why, he said that he believed the man should be the one to have a higher salary because the man should be supporting the household. I said it was bullshit. He was also upset that I was working in my career and he wasn’t. He wasted $30,000 on school and never used his degree. We had only been seeing each other for a month and he broke up with me because of it. He said that I was too career oriented and that he wasn’t used to it. He had been married to a woman who didn’t work a day in her life. Of course, I did find out later on that he had a few women on the go. Not a single tear was wasted and not a single regret existed. Yeah I’m still single but single is better sometimes. Your husband might be insecure about the fact that you will be making amazing money therefor you will not NEED him anymore. Or he could have someone on the side. Any number of reasons. A lot of men don’t like women to outshine them or women who have a strong personality

    • Some men are SO INSECURE.. My ex got upset if I brought a few things to his place when staying for a week. I just didn’t feel right not contributing, especially when he was talking buying a place together and marriage. But Mr. Insecure couldn’t handle an accomplished and independent woman. So glad when be talked about buying a place together, I said it wouldn’t be for a year. (As I never intended to sale my house, and would need time before getting one with him too)
      Some men prefer barefoot and pregnant over independent and strong willed.. I choose single before being needy.. 🙂

    • Shawna Marie Aubrey so true!!!

  68. See, that would make me suspicious lol it would make me think “he’s afraid of me becoming a lawyer, what is he hiding?!”

  69. Shawn Oliver Shawn Oliver says:

    That has got to be the dumbest man around.

  70. Mayne you should leave him before he gets the chance to leave you. Maybe then he’ll realize how stupid he was being and change his mind..

  71. Cory Berube Cory Berube says:

    Sue him for stupidity. Pretty solid case.

  72. I changed my entire life around because my ex said “I couldn’t be with someone who is in school for that long” in response to me going to medical school. I switched majors from a bachelor of physics + radiation therapy, to something unrelated but would allow me to graduate sooner. 5 years later, he’s gone and I’m back working toward my MD. I resented him for it for years and regret making a decision for anyone but myself at the time. I’m now 5 years behind my peers, and not going to be a practicing physician until I’m 36.
    My current partner is 100% supportive of my every decision. If I decided I wanted to weave baskets for a living, he might double check my sanity but in the end he would encourage me to pursue my dreams. That’s what a healthy relationship looks like! Genuine love and support, not lines in the sand and one sided concessions.

  73. Luc St.amour Luc St.amour says:

    I’m sorry to tell you. There’s another woman in the picture!!!! No one comes up with an excuse that much. Except if he wants out to be with someone else.

  74. Luc Paquette Luc Paquette says:

    Meth. He’s making meth.

  75. This is crazy! Sounds like he’s making an excuse to leave you, and picked something he knew you weren’t going to stop doing. I’d end it now. Don’t even give him a chance.

  76. Lisa Dunbar Lisa Dunbar says:

    It sounds like a cop out.
    Go now before it interferes with your NEW job!
    You will meet so many people when you start work, you won’t have time to be sad!

  77. What does he do for work? Could he be the type of man that’s insecure about what he makes and thinks you’ll outshine him? All red flags and I’d happily divorce him.

  78. Ivan Leo Ivan Leo says:

    Personally I feel it is a cop out to end the relationship as he can’t tell you the real reason.

  79. Christine T Christine T says:

    I say call it first ! Have a serious talk with him and be like if it’s really over when I’m done school, then let’s not wait and divorce now ! Why would you play this stupid game be smart be strong! Because what he did was beyond just stringing you along…. he married you. Did he think you where going to school for fun?

  80. Sounds like he wants out and can’t think of a better reason to tell you. Obviously not the brightest individual. Set him free.. LOL.

  81. sounds like a really bad excuse to end a marriage. Maybe talk to him and find out what’s really going on cause that makes no sense

  82. He is a dick… You do what u got to do.. Tell him to hit the road

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