Is anyone listening

I need a hug. I need a friend, I need to hear I’m going to be ok, my mental health is getting worse and I can’t even control it. Nothings falling apart, everything is exactly where it’s suppose to be. I have the perfect life but yet I feel alone in a full room of people, I feel like I’m annoying everyone that’s around me, I don’t feel wanted anymore.
I’m loved by so many but yet I cry my eyes out every time I’m alone, I hate myself. And don’t know why.
I need out of my head.
Here’s a link to that book:
https://www.amazon.ca/Love-Yourself-First-self-esteem-Change-ebook/dp/B07CYFHBHJ
<3 You're not alone. I'm so sorry you're struggling, and I know it sucks when everything feels out of your control. For what it's worth, please know that you are both loved and loveable. You got this.
I'd like to recommend a book that I think will help. (I have it on audiobook, but I think there's a paper copy out there somewhere if that's what you need.) It's called:
LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!
Boost Your Self-Esteem in 30 Days
by Marc Reklau
It might seem a bit basic, but I think that's what's good about it. It reminded me of all these habits I used to engage in, and other habits I used to steadfastly avoid. Kinda brought it all back to the low-key foundational things, habits and thoughts that matter and support us.
<3 Hang in there.
I feel the same way except i’ve been on “lockdown” for more than a year while everyone is out and about living their lives and partying. I’ve even lost contact with my so called family in this period and so called friends. I’ve been putting up mental walls because even my spouse only cares about her life these days, she still gets to go out and talk to coworkers. I’d go for a drive but every time i leave it seems the police are pulling me over.
Hello, I need hugs too.
What you’re describing is pretty much the textbook definition of depression. Speak to your doctor, a therapist, a psychologist, or find online resources that can help. You’re not alone