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I hate my step kids!

There….I said it. Having step kids is the most draining, both mentally and financially, thing a person can put themselves through. I do have a decent relationship with my step kids but I recommend this life to no one. People feel bad for kids whose parents aren’t together but these are the kids who get more tax payer money than any other kid. They also will quickly forget you when their parent dies despite the fact that you had to treat them as your own. It is a life that no one should try to be a part of.

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285 Responses

  1. You are fucked in the head, who ever don’t like kids and don’t want to make them as if they are your own ! Then leave they are better off without you

  2. I have a feeling I know who it is that posted this and if so honestly they are a no life piece of s*** to begin with. And those kids are better off without you. Get bent you deadbeat big lipped bitch.

  3. I love my kids and troubles come with all of them. Some kids just aren’t actually parented. Maybe you are the problem. Or maybe yours are terrible little demons that shit on everything good you try and winger about any mistakes you make. Good luck chuck!

  4. Kevin Dick Kevin Dick says:

    “decent relationship” you obviously haven’t connected with your step children. If you think they’ll forget you once their parent passes on……your doing it wrong. “Parents” is an over glorified word for (I own them) kids dont need parents, they need people who will care for them unconditionally, and will help them with any problem they may encounter, no matter the cost or time, asking for nothing in return. Worry less about you wallet and worry more about the child your imprinting on *cough* *cough* grow up.

  5. Oh my. Sounds like you “hate” kids, period. You know, you don’t have to like everything about a kid, whether a step kid, or your “own” kid, to love them. I raised my husband’s children and wouldn’t take that back for anything. If they choose not to have anything to do with you when they’re grown up, take a look at yourself … if you felt you “had to” treat them as your own, then you shouldn’t have gotten into that relationship, how unfair to the kids to be stuck with you.

  6. Dave Jokinen Dave Jokinen says:

    Stop it they are could read this in the future and become the next Ted Bundy :p

  7. My step kids were teens when I came into there lives. I won’t say it was easy. It was very hard. But I love my step kids Daniel Aleksandŭr Myler and Jesse Loren even tho there father and I are no longer together.

  8. Marc Verdon Marc Verdon says:

    Yup especially when no one appreciates what you do for them. I would never do it again.

  9. Wow. Maybe you shouldn’t have married someone who had kids then.
    I feel bad for your step children.

  10. Shana Marie Shana Marie says:

    Shawna Larose well said

  11. It’s a lot of work to be a step-parent but also very rewarding. It’s not always easy but neither is raising your own kids. I love my step-dad as my own father and my boyfriend’s son as my own. Not all people are cut out for this job though apparently. It really is sad to think you hate these children.

  12. not all family dynamics are fitting

  13. Maks Bee Maks Bee says:

    I’ll be meeting my step daughter in the next little while and I can say with 100% certainty that I’m so excited!
    I have aunts that had my grandmother as their step mother and said it was awful and I was told by my grandmother that having step children wasn’t easy for her but she also said she was one individual among many that love it. It’s all a matter of perspective but if you’re not one for children or raising someone else’s child then you should not have gotten into a relationship with someone who had kids, don’t ever expect your partner to chose you over them….deal with it or get the fuck out.

  14. Carter Hart Carter Hart says:

    stupid theory, you shouldn’t have kids under your watch.

  15. my step kids were a nightmare. (grown ups) Made my life hell. Finally split with their dad.. thank god I never have to deal with them ever again!

  16. I am sorry but I totally do not agree with your post, I love my step kids with all my heart and even the ones from a past relationship. I would go to the moon and back for them if they would need me to and I am sure they know it. Right Kevin Piper, Kevin McDonald, Joey McDonald !?!

  17. This post made me so sad for you. My stepchildren are MY LIFE. I love them as if they were my flesh and blood. I made a commitment to love and care for them and I will honour that with everything I am. You need to take a long look at why you agreed to marry this person knowing that kids were involved and it would be a challenging journey. My heart breaks for the whole family.

  18. Im sure this was written just to trigger everyone. And it did lol .

  19. Nancy Brown Nancy Brown says:

    What a seriously sad statement. I take it your partner died and the kids no longer visit? That is a shame but you are wasting the ‘hate’ and your life just to be miserable. I love my ‘kids’ – yes step kids but no distinction should be made. They do their best to visit. I know they are busy. One lives in another province, one lives 6 hours away and the other lives in town. They all have started their own lives and I/we are happy with any visit. I am sure they would still visit me if the ‘real’ parent was not here. I’m sure I would at least hear from them through fb. They are great kids. Happy to be part of their lives.

  20. Step parents rock!!! ❤️ Katrina Brewer can be difficult sometimes but the best thing ever!

  21. Wow. You need your ovaries ripped out to end your blood line here.

  22. Tyler Pilon Tyler Pilon says:

    You have problems bud… And its not those kids

  23. Neil Daggett Neil Daggett says:

    Dear OP, you sound like a shit bag. A real lousy human being. You sound as though you shouldn’t even be allowed around kids, let alone step parenting them. I’m sure they are just as fond of you as you are them. Those poor kids.

  24. Maybe it’s because you’re a negative, half insane, miserable bitch lol

  25. Ivan Leo kids can totally be shitty. They’re learning. They’re tiny human beings. It’s up to us to love them and teach them right from wrong. Hate is a strong word and you don’t just decide to hate a damn child because they “are shitty”.

  26. I don’t know I think being a Step Parent is the best job in the world and I would 100% never want to trade it for anything. I think what you are looking for is a gold star for being a decent fucking person and I’m sorry for saying so but that isn’t how life works cupcake. These kids WILL love you like a child loves a parent if you work for it. If you are genuine and loving and don’t resent them. Why not go back to having no kids, clearly this parenting thing isn’t working out for you.

  27. Ivan Leo Ivan Leo says:

    Of the kids are shitty, this is also very possible.

  28. This is pretty sad you hate them and I am sure they feel that and hate you for it. They owe you nothing. How does your spouse feel about this. I would pack your bags.

  29. My step kids are amazing. Kids are family. If you didn’t want them or can’t treat them as your own,then you shouldn’t have married their parent. Step up,love them and treat them as your own. Children know when they’re not wanted and that’s a horrible way to feel.

  30. Cecilio West Cecilio West says:

    Stuff this guy, he should grow a pair!

  31. I both never really knew my father (was raised by my mom, and my step-dad when he wasn’t out of town for work), and have worked in taxation, so I’m fairly well qualified to state your comment about kids with step-parents getting more taxpayer money is just a load of crap. Only one parent is permitted to claim the child. I believe at one point the claim could be split, but at no point could both parents legitimately qualify to receive the full amount.

    That aside, you chose to pursue a relationship with someone who had children. So either you knew what you were signing up for, or you were disingenuous about accepting your partner as they were, children and all – because the reality is, a parent and child are a package deal. You can’t accept only part of the package – it’s an all or nothing proposition.

    • If the child has any kind of special needs, it’s a fact that 75% of the CAS caseload is special needs kids. More social services are given to kids in stepfamilies, especially where the stepmom is raising a high needs kid.

  32. I totally disagree with this being a stepparent is a blessing I treat my stepdaughters exactly the same way as I treat my children why because I chose to take them on as my own just like my fiance chose to take mine on like his own so I’ll say it again being a stepparent is amazing I have been a stepparent for 10 years and I would not change anyting I fell in love with them at first sight and I will love them till the day I die they are my children.

  33. Nicole Pilon Nicole Pilon says:

    . I met my husband 14 years ago and he had a handsom little 8 year old boy and a beautiful 5 year old girl, now they are 22 and 19..and I wouldn’t change anything in this world.. I love those kids too death and we also have a 12 year old.. Being a step parent is the best feeling in the world knowing that you have helped raise them and that they look up to you.. Grrrr this post pissed me right off.. If you hate them so bad then you need to leave and save everyone the heartache and headache.

  34. The op should have been realistic and not just expect everything to work out perfectly. There’s no garentees when you decide to be with someone who has kids that those kids are going to love you but by chosing to be with their parent you are choosing to love their children.

  35. Seriously, are you a joke oops..I meant is this a joke. If you knew he had children why even bother. If you were my spouse I would boot you out and change all locks. YOU might feel this way doesn’t mean other normal human beings would feel the same.

  36. Jason Jameus Jason Jameus says:

    Wtf! I hope the person you are in a relationship with figures out who posted this so they can get their kids away from you! If you think your step kids will forget you you are definitely not being a step parent. Do everyone a favor go get fixed!

  37. Nic Benz I mean I wouldn’t blame her..

  38. Cecilio West Cecilio West says:

    I love my step kids, to me they are my own.. listen to this you big cry baby… I do everything for my step kids and my girlfriend half the time hates me… she wont even put me on her face book as her partner! Lol… your lucky those children like you!

    • Misty King Misty King says:

      Wow…how sad is it when your girlfriend (half the time) hates the person who cares so deeply about her kids. Not sure how serious you are with this comment, but if there is any truth to it, I genuinely feel sorry for your situation. Not all men are as accepting of children from other relationships – she should be thrilled. Best of luck.

    • Misty King Misty King says:

      Wow…how sad is it when your girlfriend (half the time) hates the person who cares so deeply about her kids. Not sure how serious you are with this comment, but if there is any truth to it, I genuinely feel sorry for your situation. Not all men are as accepting of children from other relationships – she should be thrilled. Best of luck.

    • Cecilio West Cecilio West says:

      Misty King .. I have 3 daughters a step daughter and two step sons who call me dad… they are all my world.. yes shes bitter with me most of the time but shes had it hard and now she feels safe to Express herself with someone who will respect it… not saying I like it, cause its mentally draining, just saying dont take it out on the babies..

    • Misty King Misty King says:

      I can only imagine the tension if she is bitter with you most of the time – kids are so intuitive with picking up on these feelings. When families combine, there can be a lot of stress for both kids and adults. Loving and accepting those children as your own should help alleviate a lot of that stress, strengthen your bonds and heal a hard past. I am not judging because I don’t know her past, but she should be over the moon. Not all single parents have the luxury she has with an on-board partner. Obviously true by the huge response this post has received.

    • Cecilio West Cecilio West says:

      Misty King … that’s what i thought..it gets worse than that. lol… but I’ll keep trying to make her happy… I’m a full blown believer of making my partner happy.. at the start of the relationship I screwed up thinking she was just another short term relationship and yes I was talking to a lot of women.. she went through my phone one night and found out… that was in the first month of our relationship… ever since I’ve been making it up to her. I dont blame her for being bitter and doing the same to me cause yes she did.. hit me right where it hurts. She just needs more time than me to recover.

  39. I loved being a step parent to a wonderful boy for over 10 years things didnt work out with his dad and I and I dont have a close relationship with him now due to circumstances outside of my control however I will always and forever be there for this boy no matter how much time passes. I dont knowhow you could even post all this it seems so hateful

  40. I had evil step children and over the age of 30, who figure.

  41. Anne Roach Anne Roach says:

    It is so very obvious, that Mr, Anonymous has Issues.

  42. I’ve got 3 step kids, and 3 of my own. I love them all the same. You, sir or madam, are a piece of shit. Wow

  43. Anne Roach Anne Roach says:

    No one feels bad for children who’s parents are not together. Children never forget the ones that truly cared for them, nor do they ever forget the ones who hate them. No one has to treat children as their own, but they should respect them.

  44. I had step kids a d they pushed me hard but it was all worth it today the love and respect from them made it all worth wild

  45. You are evil. I don’t know if you are a step mom or a step dad but whichever you are, you should not be involved with children at all. I hope you don’t have any of your own. Your words are nasty and it’s obvious that you have an inner hatred. I have had step children and I do understand that it can be emotionally and physically draining but your words depict anger, hatred and also jealousy. Trust me, I went through hell with one of them but no matter what, deep down, I loved them. For you to be able to say these words, anonymously or not, those kids can feel that hate and anger. Get out now and do the kids a favour.

  46. Jeff Pigeon Jeff Pigeon says:

    Sometimes I think my son likes my gf more then me. He says it too…

  47. Im a step kid.. And my dad and mom havent been together for over 10 years and he is still my one and only dad. He is grandpa to my children and is amazing.. His kids are still my bothers and sisters.. No matter what.. And you need to change your way of thinking or they will forget you… Being a step parent is the most rewarding job even more so then being a blood parent.. Because you make the choice to love them no matter what.. Regardless of anything really… So fix your way of thinking.. I also have a step son. His mom and I get along really well and all of us love him no matter what. Ill never stop loving him no matter how old he gets..

  48. Liam Robins Liam Robins says:

    I have always hated the step parents that have tried to force themselves into my life. The feeling is mutual.

  49. Everyone here is shitting on the OP. But there isn’t enough info in the post to be able to judge. Not that we should judge anyway. But really, we don’t know if these are young children who were badly raised and are now the evil rulers of the house. Children like that are extremely difficult to like, let alone love, especially if they’re not even yours. They can make any relationship horrible, even if both parents are the natural parents. Sadly many many young couples do this to themselves by never disciplining their kids and giving in to their every demand and whiny wants. Or perhaps the kids are teenagers who were set in their ways before the OP came along. They could be really nasty, mouthy, demanding, know it all kids who don’t care if the OP loves them. In all likelihood the OP, for the sake of his/her spouse, has given it their best shot but can’t make any progress because the kids just won’t allow it. I can see how that would be frustrating beyond belief. Imagine how angry or sad the OP must be to finally come to a point where they made this post out of sheer frustration. It’s a sad situation but We could probably sympathize to a degree if we knew the details.

  50. Wow that’s harsh…I think you should leave the relationship and never..ever have children of your own!

  51. I think maybe only self absorbed psychopaths hate children. Just saying. Wtf

  52. Lisanne Bond Lisanne Bond says:

    You’re a hoot at parties, aren’t you?

  53. Rod Golden Rod Golden says:

    If you knew your partner had kids from a previous relationship and you still got with them then you accepted there children as well and like others have said if your not happy then leave no one is putting a gun to your head i think your childish for your post and it pisses me off that you can actually say you hate a child either deal and accept it or leave its that simple

  54. Anonymous??? Hope you stay that way cause I’m out to beat you senseless right about now. My kids have an amazing step mother!! Thank God she is not like you. You are a LOSER!!!!!

  55. While not a StepMom, I was a StepGrandma – MIMI (she named me), & I gladly stepped up since the other Grandma was on the other coast. We loved the little munchkin almost immediately & yes there were bumps in the road, but so rewarding over all. NEVER regretted one minute, one hug, one kiss, one tantrum.

  56. Ever brutal thing to say! Think you should reevaluate your relationship with their parent. As for me, I love and would do anything for my step kids!

  57. Sorry to hear that. Have you tried family therapy.

  58. My stepfather is the most amazing man on this planet. He’s the best thing that happened to my mom. He treats and loves my sister and I as his daughters and my children as his own grandchildren. I feel terrible for your stepdaughter.

  59. Bri Cameron Bri Cameron says:

    This makes me sad. My stepkids have changed my life. I can’t imagine what it would be like without them. Especially having their baby brother now.

  60. My step son is the greatest thing that ever happened to me. And the fact that I just got his older half brother under our roof makes me even more happy. I love my bonus children with all my heart!!!

  61. I don’t hate my steps kids. I love them as my own, however, that being said, I hate their mom.

  62. Better stay anonymous..jgnorant

  63. Wow lol you’re a horrid thing .

  64. As a single mother of 2 dating a man with 2 kids this comment makes me sick to my stomach!!!

  65. Jeff Langis Jeff Langis says:

    the best thing you can do both for your step kids and yourself is to walk away and never look back. ” but my significant other!” they’re not so significant if you cant handle what comes with them. and that includes kids. kids still play a VERY big role in parents lives so for you to have shortfall with it….its really sad. stop being petty and walkaway before you damage yourself and them.

  66. Wanna know what I loved being a step parent to my ex’s kids best experience ever have have your own kids and your partners kids call you dad best feeling

  67. I think this person just has no kids at all..or have any step kids… yes kids cost money to feed but no one forces someone to take care of a kid that is not your own…it’s a choice a lot of people make happily…must be in a really bad relationship if being forced to take care of someone eles child is how you feel…..

  68. Bob Jones Bob Jones says:

    So many triggered … Lmao bahaha

  69. Carly Verch Carly Verch says:

    Leave dumb fuck ur step.kids deserve better then ur trash ass

  70. Des Tam Des Tam says:

    This post is horrible. I don’t have any step kids but if I did I would love them as much as I love my own children

  71. Ashley Major Ashley Major says:

    You’re a heartless wench, I love my step daughter like my own, she and I have a beautiful relationship and showed me how lovely it is to be a parent. I can’t wait for our family to go together. SHAME ON YOU

  72. Sherri Ivory Sherri Ivory says:

    Don’t worry, with that attitude Im sure your step kids hate you too…..asshole

  73. Ryan Clement Ryan Clement says:

    Hey Anonymous dicknose…go fuck yourself with an axe. Those kids deserve someone better than you.

  74. Obviously you never had a connection with these kids. And of course they will quickly forget you, as I’m sure they felt that you were pretending to treat them as your own. Poor kids. They deserved better.

  75. Renee Leduc Renee Leduc says:

    I’m not even with my step daughters father anymore and pick her up as often as possible so the kids can foster their relationship as dad is a deadbeat. I don’t get this. Kids aren’t asked to be brought into fucked up situation.

    You sir, or madam, are fucked.

  76. Sounds to me like the parental guidance of respect is not there.

  77. Mike Charron Mike Charron says:

    I think my IQ decreased reading this

  78. Matthew Shaw Matthew Shaw says:

    i think my old step dad did too, he physically abused me and was always hitting on my girlfriends, everyone deserves love. you need to be a little more compassionate. I hope your partner reads this and figures it out because kids should come first.

  79. Are you fucking kidding me? These are kids that need extra love! These are kids that wanted their parents to stay together but regardless of effort put through by one parent or both it just didn’t work out. Do they care weather or not their parents get extra money for them, absolutely not. They’d take there life back to normal over money any day. Some of these “step kids “ as you so carelessly call them took their parents brake up so hard or even blame themselves. Having two families is absolutely not easy on anyone. It’s hard on the kids who have a hard time trying to love a new bonus mom and or bonus dad. When they just want their family back together. It’s hard on moms heart to know and accept that her children that she baked and raised will love another woman as a mother figure. Those are her babies and now she has to share. It’s hard on dads, always feeling like they failed their kids like they aren’t good enough no matter what they do, and at the end of the day they just aren’t mom. It’s hard on bonus dads always trying to be the man of the house but knowing they will never fill the shoes of the man who once lived in this family but trying their best feeling like they just may never fit in. And yes it’s hard on bonus moms and it’s exhausting you’re right. But you chose to love those children’s father and with that had to come love for a whole family that you didn’t make. Yes it’s upsetting yes you’re gunna hurt and feel like maybe you just aren’t good enough for these beautiful children that you didn’t make but you love them and you stand strong doing the best that you can every day cause you see the hurt in their eyes you see all the broken pieces in their heart and you don’t want to make it worse for them.
    I have 5 children of my own and my spouse has shared 50/50 custody of his 3 Beautiful children. It isn’t easy by no means but we make it work. They have an amazing mother who loves them and they have a great bonus dad who also loves them at one home and at the other they have an amazing dad a bonus mom and 5 siblings who love them. They need extra love and they got it.
    Personally I feel lucky and honoured to have them in my life.

    If you can’t look at your step children with love and feel nothing but bad feelings then you need to remove yourself. Don’t hurt them anymore then they have already been hurt. And I truly hope that they never figure out this is you and read this.

  80. I’m a step parent to a 13 yr old. I have been raising him since he was 18mths old. Now I’m raising him on my own.

  81. Leave then those kids don’t deserve you

  82. Unreal you shouldn’t be a parent at all crazy give yr hard a shake
    I married my husband he has 2 and I have 2 and all is good

  83. Oh my. How mean. My father passed ten years ago and my StepMom is still a huge part of my life Pam Derks ♥️

  84. Disgusting. Theres a reason they didnt continue to have a relationship with you. Kids can feel you dont like them, even if u were pretending too. I have a step daughter who I met when she was 3, who is now a teenager. I always welcomed her into my home, treated her exactly as i would my own kids. Loved her and cared for her as my own and always treated her with respect and now I am not with her father anymore, she still wants to come visit here and will come sleep over and hang with her other siblings. She will always be welcome in my home and heart!

  85. Being a step mom has been one of the best experiences of my life. I have two of my own kids, but when people ask, I say I have 4 because of them. Enhancing their life has been hard and FOR SURE draining, but it’s worth it. It’ll be worth it when they have their own children who call me grandma, or watching them walk across the stage at graduation, or when they tell people they have four parents instead of two. Idk maybe you’re just someone who doesn’t like kids, whatever, but you should make an effort to try and love them because I can promise you, they’ll love you back eventually and it’ll be amazing.

    • I think this person just has no kids at all..or have any step kids… yes kids cost money to feed but no one forces someone to take care of a kid that is not your own…it’s a choice a lot of people make happily…must be in a really bad relationship if being forced to take care of someone eles child is how you feel…..

    • Sorry did not mean to reply to you…your comments how I seen this post lol…

  86. Holly L Good Holly L Good says:

    Im new to the step mom thing and i have to girls of my own, and now i have 2 boys that i will grow to love and always wanted a boy now i have 2 and very greatful for.

  87. What a horrible thing to say.. I adore my step daughter and love her as if she were my own blood. If you feel like this, you should re-evalutate the relationship you’re in because you will eventually show these feelings to the kids and they don’t deserve that from a parental figure or anyone for that matter. They did not chose you. You chose to be with their parent, so buck up or shut up to say the least.

  88. Sell them on EBAY! Lmao jk you a MONSTER ! THERE I SAID IT !

  89. Kevin Pascoe Kevin Pascoe says:

    Would it make you feel better to know that most of the people you’ll meet in life will forget about you?

  90. Debrah Blair Debrah Blair says:

    Your an idiot.. there WE ALL said it

  91. You know what OP? What you give,is what you get. I feel horrible for your stepchildren and I hope they’re almost old enough to walk away from you when they get the chance, don’t expect any Hallmark cards or love and praise in the future. I am blessed with my stepson, we may not cross paths as much as we’d like, but he knows I love him. We used to but heads on and off,had the ups and downs, but over 15 years later, I don’t call him my stepson, I’m proud of how far he’s come, he may not be famous or a CEO, but he is a good man and father. Shame on you for not sucking it up and being a real parent.

  92. You should not have children… go to your dr and get fixed

  93. Guess who showed up to my wedding this summer.. my step dad. Even though my mom divorced him 14yrs ago, I still wanted him there. Your theory and outlook is very sad and inaccurate.

    • Lisa White Lisa White says:

      Tabatha Edwards my step dad walked me down the aisle as well, my step sister stood in my wedding & So did my step sons… My mother passed a year before i got married & step dad & her separated 25 yrs ago!!!!!!

    • I had my son and mother walk me down the aisle as my dad passed away 6 years prior, but it would not have been the perfect day if the man I called dad for 25yrs didnt show.

      Honestly there were times I wondered if he was going to as he didnt RSVP one way or the other, and I never told him but him being there meant more than he probably thinks…

      So I’m sure as heck glad he didnt feel about me like OP does about their step kids, or I may not be as lucky to have seen him when I walked in that day.

    • not all family dynamics are fitting

  94. What a shit way of thinking…. who ever posted this needs help

  95. Keih Gemini Keih Gemini says:

    I hope your children or grandchildren never get a step parent like you…

  96. Dude if the op can sit here and say they HATE those kids, then I have every reason to assume they’re not a “kid person” to begin with and therefore should not have pursued a relationship with someone who has kids. There are so many people out there, looking for partners, who don’t have kids already

  97. Brenda Lynn Brenda Lynn says:

    Me and my step daughter’s father separarated years ago, but I still consider her my daughter, we keep in touch, and I love her still.
    To use the word HATE…leave and go live under a rock.

  98. Wow as a step parent myself
    I do not feel as you do
    I love my step child like she’s my own

    Obviously you are not parent material and there for should have not started a relationship with someone who has children

    You sound like a selfish person

  99. Just want to add in…
    Raising kids is trying and thankless, whether they’re your own blood or not. Please don’t ever procreate.
    Those kids are an extension of your significant other. How could you hate them but love your partner? That’s wack. And honestly it can’t be much of a partnership if that’s how you feel.

  100. Ivan Leo Ivan Leo says:

    So the OP should have been able to see the future?

  101. Jen Stone , see what I did there lol

  102. Ivan Leo Ivan Leo says:

    Or suffering more themselves. It would be best to leave a situation that makes you unhappy.

  103. Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

    Cortney Jackson why do you ASSume the OP is female???

  104. I’ve had some rough times with my step kids and there have been times when the stress of it all has been all but unbearable. Lots of judgement here without really understanding the situation. OP: If you need to vent, please message me. I’ve got some good resources for help navigating the blended family life ❤️

  105. Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

    Sounds like this person tried to do whatever he/she could to help raise these kids but they don’t appreciate what this person has done for them or does it sound like they care…

    Sometimes stepkids can be awesome and then there are some that will do anything to make life harder or cause problems in the relationship…

    If kids say they hate their step parent it’s ok and acceptable but heaven forbid if a step parent says it…

    Those who were able to have a well functioning blended family…consider yourself lucky because there are ones out there that don’t…

    And no…I am not the OP…

    • Kids are kids they also say they hate their biological parents they’re just rude and/or emotional and if a child does actually hate their stepparent it’s often because they were taught to by the other parent. But the difference is they are kids the stepparent is an adult saying it’s difficult is fine, saying it’s hard is fine, saying you are stressed is fine but saying you HATE a child who’s life you chose to be apart of is horrible.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines might be horrible…but how many others out there feel the same but don’t say it because of the backlash…
      I’m sorry but I don’t believe kids are stupid and don’t know what they are saying because most do…

      So basically what you are saying is that it’s ok to say mean and rude things to others just because they are a kid???

    • Not saying it’s okay at all I’m saying it’s what they do I told my mother I hated her when I was younger doesn’t mean I actually did it was said out of anger odviously. I would never say something like that now because I’m adult and now realize how much she did for me and how much she loved me. I never said they were stupid or that they don’t know what they are saying most of the time they say it because they are angry they know it will hurt someone. Is it okay no but that’s when you send them to their room or whatever other punishment you chose because your the parent and shouldn’t allow yourself to be disrespected in your home. If others also hate their step children they should leave to. I wasn’t saying it was wrong for her to say it I was saying it was wrong for her to feel it. If you hate a child you shouldn’t be a part of their life they don’t need that. Parents are supposed to love their children unconditionally and when you choose to be a stepparent that’s what you choose to do.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines you automatically assume it’s a female who posted this…

      It’s really hard to love kids who aren’t yours when they treat you like shit…
      Yes I agree hate is a strong word…but maybe the OP wrote this while being frustrated…

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines you automatically assume it’s a female who posted this…

      It’s really hard to love kids who aren’t yours when they treat you like shit…
      Yes I agree hate is a strong word…but maybe the OP wrote this while being frustrated…

    • Your right on that part I shouldn’t have assumed but even if it is a man it makes no difference. Any parent in a child’s life should love them love is not something that children need to earn or that it should be hard to do love is just given by parents and that’s exactly my point when you choose to be a stepparent you chose to love those children or you don’t persue the relationship with their parent. And I hope it was just said out of frustration but that’s still not really okay and definitely wouldn’t be okay if they got frustrated and said this to the children and like I said saying it is not the only problem the fact that they felt it at all is the problem.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines people are entitled to feel how they do regardless if we agree or not…

      It sounds like this person tried but for reasons unknown to us…it didn’t work…

      Kids have to learn respect as well and can’t go around treating people like crap either…

      Again I don’t know the circumstances behind why this person feels this way but I’m not necessarily going to say they’re wrong either…

    • Not saying they can’t feel that way. They can feel whatever way they want doesn’t make it any less terrible. I’m saying if they feel that way they shouldn’t be in those kids lives and should leave. Instead of letting it get to this point the op should have left. I Already said they should be punished if they are being disrespectful not once did I say to allow it. I said that’s what kids do not that parents shouldn’t try to correct the behavior. And no we don’t know the circumstances but in my opinion I don’t think it’s ever okay to say you hate a child when you CHOSE to be in their life they didn’t choose to have a stepparent but the stepparent did choose to be a stepparent.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines it sounds as though the kids mentioned in the post are older and that although the step parent tried to be everything a step parent should be and do…these kids disregarded that when the biological parent passed away…

    • They also say they have a decent relationship with her step kids. Also if they are older kids pull away from their parents when they are older it’s not necessarily just because they are a stepparent. And I guess the scenario your explaining would depend how long she’s been in the children’s lives. I was about 15 I think when my mom met my stepdad and I’ll be honest I didn’t like him at first. For older kids having someone come into your life and try to take on any kind of parenting role is annoying and frustrating. And trust me the stepparent and child will not get along at times. But in a way I’m glad he did take on as much of a parenting role as he could at that age because now my kids have an awesome Papa and I have grown to care about him and think of him as part of my family. We don’t know the circumstances here maybe op wasn’t in their lives that long before their parent died and the kids didn’t really form a bond yet. No matter the circumstances it’s not the kids fault and there is no reason it should get to the point of saying you hate children who’s lives the stepparent chose to be in.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines it needs to go both ways though…
      You’re right they didn’t ask for the step parent but the kids should at least put in the effort to appreciate it…

    • It would be nice if they did but they have no responsibility to do that the relationship was not their choice it was their parent and their stepparents choice. They did not choose this person their parent did. It takes time to love someone as a parent and build that kind of relationship and trust when you were not born their child. An adult stranger comes into your life and your not going to trust that person right away nevermind like them or love them you don’t know them it takes time to build a bond. Sometimes the kids do build a bond with you pretty quickly other times it takes years, but no it’s not the kids job to try it’s the person who chose to be a part of their lives job and if you can’t keep trying even if it’s not turning out the way you hoped and it’s not all rainbows and butterflies (Which for the most part being a stepparent never is and sometimes that has nothing to do with the relationship with the child) but if you’re not willing to keep trying and caring and loving them unconditionally no matter what then your not cut out to be in a parenting role to those children and should leave.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines I disagree…
      No relationship can be one sided for very long regardless of the situation…
      If my child wasn’t putting forth the effort when my SO was trying everything possible…then I would be disappointed in that child…
      Children are put in positions all the time where there is some sort of adjustment and they do fine…

    • Well we are clearly never going to agree on this because I don’t ever think it is okay to blame a child for not putting effort into a relationship they did not choose to be a part of. Biological or not it is always the parents responsibility to try to have a relationship with their children. If anyone would choose to stay with someone who hated their child then the child would be better off without both of them. Children come first period and I can’t stand people who blame children they are children adults should act like adults. Nobody should be forced to love someone. A relationship can be one sided they don’t have to love someone they don’t want to. And the stepparent can accept that and stay and continue be a part of their lives and love them because that’s what they chose when they chose to be with someone with a child( there were no garentees everything would work out perfectly) or they choose to leave. If the steparent was trying like you think the op was then they most likely would have some kind of bond which the op says they do. Just because the op doesn’t have the relationship they want and they think the kids should love them more like a parent or something isn’t a reason to hate them. If you hate a child you are the problem and you need to leave the relationship it’s pretty simple.

    • Jen Stone Jen Stone says:

      Chelsea Mines never said the children had to love the person but they do have to at least try…
      I can’t stand when people coddle children and let them rule the roost…

      Agree to disagree because unless the step parent is abusing the child…then I believe both need to make an effort or it definitely won’t work…

    • Never said children should rule. Have actually said that they shouldn’t be aloud to be disrespectful and should be punished if they are two times before this. Simply said they don’t have to love or even like the person they didn’t choose to have them in their lives but the stepparent does have to love the child or at the very least continue to try because that is there job and that’s what they chose and if they can’t do that they need to leave. and that is what this post was about not about children being disrespectful (which again is not okay) but about the stepparent hates the kids and hates being a stepparent. It says they have a decent relationship with the kids therefore clearly the kids make some sort of effort (although no they don’t have to they don’t even have to like them they just have to be respectful). Op seems to be complaining that having a decent relationship with their step kids is not good enough and with saying they hate them I would expect much less then a decent relationship op clearly doesn’t deserve one. But sure agree to disagree.

    • I know I hated the man my mom was with for a good portion of my life growing up. And I think he didn’t always enjoy me being around either. It’s not always easy being a step parent. I think it depends on when they get involved, how the child took the breakup and many other things. Everyone thinks it’s just an automatic positive thing and that’s not always the case. And I agree, you don’t dare say anything because you’ll get chewed out for it.
      I’m sure even some biological parents regret becoming parents…. we don’t know what ppl are going through, we don’t know how ppl feel… everyone should be aloud their own opinion on their own life and not be put down for it. To each their own!

    • But it’s not to each their own when a child is involved. The stepparent chose to be involved and they can also chose to leave and in a situation where they hate the child/ren the best thing for that child would be to leave and allow them to be surrounded by people who love and care about them. As for biological parents regretting they have children I can not really see that point of view because my children are the best thing that ever happened to me and even though yes they can be a pain sometimes I wouldn’t go back and change it if I could. However regret and hate are two completely different things. Regret may be understandable but if you hate your children you should probably seek help before that gets even worse and turns into emotional or even physical abuse.

  106. Wow. Maybe leave and find someone who doesn’t have kids. The kids didn’t ask to have you in their lives but you chose to be with a man you knew had kids. Being a stepparent can be difficult but if you hate them the problem is with you not them they are just kids.

  107. Ivan Leo Ivan Leo says:

    Look at all the judgmental people automatically making it the OP fault. Maybe the kids are shitty? Ya know what, ya tried. If your unhappy it is not good for anyone. Perhaps it is best to just move on from that family dynamic. People love to cast blame withoutout knowing any of the actual circumstances but if someone can think critically, it can be seen how taking on someone elses family may be challenging.

    • Of coarse it’s challenging I think almost every stepparent would agree it’s challenging but if it’s so bad that they honestly feel like they hate the children then they 100% should leave that kind of toxic environment is not good for anyone especially the kids. Oh and kids are shitty sometimes step or biological they are not little angels parents deal with it it’s called discipline that’s their job. People probably would have been more understanding if the op would have said that being a stepparent is hard and they are struggling. Saying you hate a child though is just terrible.

  108. Crys Ross Crys Ross says:

    Alexa Ross look at this asshole

  109. Lol if i was your partner id pack all your shit and toss it the fuck outside in the trash bc thats where you belong . ((YOU <<<<!!!!)) chose to be with that person who had kids . If that is such a big problem for YOU then YOU should have stayed the fuck away! YOU saying that YOU hate them is absolutely cruel and it makes YOU a piece of shit .expecially posting it online.YOU are a selfish degenerate pig.

  110. Daniel Dube Daniel Dube says:

    OP does not deserve to have those people in his life.

  111. Grant Garber Grant Garber says:

    How can this person say that, totally f@#king selfish, kids are a blessing regardless.

  112. Hope u stub ur toe today and it hurts

  113. Reily Burns Reily Burns says:

    you must really love you husband or wife!

  114. Wanda Deloye Wanda Deloye says:

    Sounds like the parent died and this poster is not getting a dime and they are mad about that.

  115. You are an idiot! I feel sorry for your step kids. Shame on you!

  116. This absolutely disgusts me.

  117. Hates them but still claims their tax credits. Lmao.

  118. Noah Jonathan Thibert-Moxam , thank goodness for people like you!

  119. Wow….selfish & pathetic

  120. You’re an idiot. Plain and simple. If your stepkids forget about you when the other parent dies its because you’re fucking forgettable and weren’t worth keeping in their life. You knew what being a stepparent was when you signed up. Being a parent is generally a thankless job as it is. You’re a selfish human being for taking that on, coming into someones life willingly, and then pretending like you had no idea what to expect when things weren’t perfect. Fuck off m8.

  121. Da fuck is wrong with you !!

  122. I don’t see how they would benefit more from taxpayer money than any other child..

  123. Wow!!! You’re an asshole! I feel sorry for your stepkids, and I sincerely hope that they don’t feel you’re selfish hatred towards them!!!
    And I also hope that your spouse (their parent) sees this first before them and helps you pack your things … completely disgusting

  124. Step-children and step parents are a gift. Yeah at times it can be difficult. Your step child deserves better

  125. Jes Sirvage Jes Sirvage says:

    This has to be a fake…

  126. It’s only going to get harder… your feelings toward these kids will turn into resentment. Your relationship with your spouse will start to deteriorate. Walk away. None of you need this kind of toxicity.

  127. People like you, are why stepkids have a hard time trusting and loving their stepparents. Fucking shame on you.

  128. They must hate you too fool

  129. Maybe your not trying hard enough. My step daughter is the best a person can ask for. I love her as if I gave birth to her myself. You must remember. Your step children are just that. Children. This is just as hard or even harder on them then you think. They have to adjust to this new life and will push you just to see what they can an cannot get away with with you. Your the adult so act like it and try harder and put yourself in there shoes. Sure I had issues with my step daughter but I did not give up and had to realize that this was hard on her, me, my own children and the entire family. So if you want her respect, the respect of your partner and a happy loving family, then do whatever it takes to make it work or you will be the one alone. A parent will always take there child side in the end.

  130. Becoming a step mom is one of the best things that has ever happened in my life!

  131. Maybe you should have thought about the consequences, both good and bad, before entering the relationship. Being a parent means being selfless for your kids, regardless if they are biologically yours or not. That being said, every situation is different

  132. This makes me really sad.. for both your partner and those kids. Lose, lose situation. Do them the favour and leave. So they can find someone who cherishes them in the way they deserve.

  133. Mike Newman Mike Newman says:

    Julie Pilon Sounds like someone we both know…. a ex of mine maybe? Lol

  134. Maybe you should leave then, if you cant love them completely like your own why are you there.

  135. This must be Cinderella’s stepmother.

  136. Just imagine the step-children’s perspective in this story. I bet you’re a real peach.

  137. Carie Adams Carie Adams says:

    You are disgusting! I feel horrible for your step children and your spouse! Your post is also very untrue! My step father raised me since I was 5 years old! I’m 32 now and my children love him and only know him as grandpa! My dad was killed in an accident when I was 8 and my step dad didn’t even hesitate to jump in and raise me with my Mom when he could have bailed! I’ll never forget what he’s done for me throughout my entire life and still continues to be there for me. I’m sorry your relationship isn’t what you’d like it to be but don’t post shit like this and discourage people from finding love with someone with children just because you don’t like it!

  138. Wow. This is absolutely horrible. I couldn’t imagine NOT being a step parent to my bonus (step) son. Yes, it’s not easy. Yes, it takes extra time and money. Yes, dealing with the other parent comes with some challenges. But in the end, you are the one making a difference in a child’s life. I love this little boy like he were my own. I am positive that he will always love and care for me, even when he grows up. You should have never married a person with a child if you weren’t willing to put in 100%.

  139. Kelly Turner Kelly Turner says:

    Zack Andrew McAuliffe I love being your other mom. No step parent for me. I choose to be part of your life and consider myself lucky to have helped raise you. What a sad post.

  140. This can’t be real…. are there really people out there with this mentality? If so, you shoukd not be parenting kids! End of story!!

    • Christine Lamothe this is a big case of you just don’t understand unless you’ve been there. I’ve been through the ringer with step kids and I can appreciate how someone might feel the way they do.

    • Carolle Stein – Oh I understand!! I am from a blended family 🙂 I have lived this for 20+ years! If I sensed that a step parent didn’t like me, they wouldn’t be my step parent for long… sure it takes time getting used to, but people should never HATE their stepchildren… they have probably been through enough… and don’t need more negativity in their life!

  141. Ive attempted to date people who already had children and theres nothing wrong with admitting its not for you … it doesnt make you a bad person or a selfish one for that matter. If its not for you, then simply walk away before they can feel the hate you have for them.

    • Mike Newman Mike Newman says:

      I fully agree but once you get into a relationship with someone you gotta figure it out if you want that life…after a few years you say fuck it and leave that’s their issue kinda deal

    • I’m the same. I dated someone with kids and it was not for me. Honestly, I don’t feel like playing step-mom. If I’m gonna have kids, I want it to me on my own with someone when the right time comes along. Dating someone with kids means the ex is always around, going to be problems, ect. I don’t want to be in the middle of their ‘arguments’. It’s uncomfortable. If the kids are older and out of the house, we might have a different situation here. But younger children, not really for me – especially if the parents spoil them/give them what they want at all times, and to be honest, they have attitudes and not raised right. I have no patience for that. When I discipline them more that my significant other, it’s just bizarre.

    • Not all co parents are like that, my ex and I dont argue or put his wife/my husband in the middle of it, all 4 of us co parent and I thank god my husband and his wife dont hate my little girl , not saying you were wrong for leaving .. you make your life and decide what you want / dont want in it .. just wanted to point out that co parenting / step parenting isnt always arguing and bullshit

    • For sure, the ones who can actually be civil, is good. But a lot of them still argue/fight. But just in general, dating someone with kids just isn’t for me.

    • Yeah, I get that, but you didn’t be selfsih and stay for the dad and treat the kids like shit and I respect that

  142. Luc Rioux Luc Rioux says:

    horrribble to have to live around someone that dosen t care really about you ….

  143. Karry Sz Karry Sz says:

    They probably don’t like you much either.

  144. These kids deserve better than you. This is just bullshit. Children deserve love!

  145. Interesting to see who thinks it is a stepmom or a stepdad. Either way your an asshole and those kids deserve better. Like you should leave and not own a pet either

  146. I so disagree!!! I have a step mom and she means everything to me! She doesn’t know what she would do without me and my sisters I love you Claire Constantin!!! Why would someone even write this post!! Best step mom I could ever have!

  147. I hope they feel the same way about you. Very harsh words.
    Those kids didn’t ask for their parents to split. I hope their father realizes what kind of monster you really are. Shame on you!

  148. Sorry you feel this way op but remember parenting is a thankless job

  149. Wow… That is awful to say.. I was in a relationship with someone who had 2 kids, and you know what? I miss those girls more than anything. I couldn’t give a crap about the ex, but I will always have a place in my heart for those girls. I enjoyed every moment I had with them, and they are the reason I don’t regret the relationship, as they taught me that I could love someone else’s kids, and want to protect them.
    You are selfish..

  150. Kylie Raine Kylie Raine says:

    Wow – that says a lot more about you then those poor children

  151. Scott Gagne Scott Gagne says:

    And the award for step mom of the year goes out to this cunt hahaha

  152. Sounds like someone doesn’t know the joys of being a step parent. And how the kids are lucky to have someone chose to love them and not have to. And can be counted on to be there if their biologicals can’t be there. Sounds like someone is not man or woman enough to be a parent even when it’s hard. And trust me it’s hard, but you treat them like your own and they will see you as their own.

  153. Maggie Bite Maggie Bite says:

    Should never be a mother let alone stepmother. Gives them bad names.my daughter is a step mom sure there are trials but you get over them. Learn to love

  154. Ladies and Gentlemen, get your pitchforks. We’ve got a monster to kill.

  155. Maybe you should have thought about things before getting into a relationship with someone who has children.

  156. That’s a disgusting thing to think and say. You can always leave if you feel this way. I love my step daughter as if she were my own and I’d do anything for her. That confession makes me sick. Sounds like these kids deserve way better than you! It’s not all about you buddy…the kids come first and if you are to blind to realize that than maybe you shouldn’t have the gift of being called “stepdad” or “stepmom”

  157. Randy Riles Randy Riles says:

    Becoming a step parent is one of the best things that has ever happened in my life!

  158. To me, this speaks more about YOUR selflessness that anything else.

  159. Very sad statements. I love mine like they r my own and they put is through hell. ..

  160. Adam Read Adam Read says:

    Well there’s the most pathetic post I’ll read all day.

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